As You Wish

Someone recently spent a year interviewing couples of all backgrounds and longevity. The results from his study were interesting, and not entirely surprising. The secrets to happiness in marriage were things like choosing to be happy no matter what, putting your spouse first, being willing to communicate. At the end of article I read, he quoted a woman who had been happily married for 50 years. When asked what the secret to happiness in marriage was, she paused for a moment and responded, “Don’t be afraid to be the one who loves the most.”

To love someone is the greatest emotion I have ever felt. To have that loved returned is so beautiful, so overwhelmingly amazing. I love the phrase, “I didn’t know that I could love someone that much” because that’s exactly how love feels. The more you give, the more it grows. It’s infinite. Tyler Knott Gregson described it, “And you loved me like I was and had always been the answer and the question did not and would never matter.”

But to love is to be vulnerable. Mitch Albom wrote, “Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open, for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty. Don’t mask or deny your vulnerability: it is your greatest asset. Be vulnerable: quake and shake in your boots with it. the new goodness that is coming to you, in the form of people, situations, and things can only come to you when you are vulnerable…”

One of the most selfless couples I've ever known.

The loud voices in the world would have us believe that we must always be in control, that we must always have the upperhand. A movie trailer I watched recently exclaimed that the first person to say “I love you” is the one who gets broken in the relationship. Taking that leap is the most terrifying thing, especially when you don’t know if they person you are falling towards will catch you. But it is only in taking risks in life that we have success. Terri Clark wrote, “If this love has any chance at all, someone has to be the first to fall.”

“The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility.” I’ve watched my friends and family find and build strong, beautiful marriages. They are all different personalities and they live in very different circumstances. But the one thing that I see in common is that they are not afraid of loving the people in their families. They are not afraid of being the one who loves more.

What a beautiful thing. Worth waiting for.